Self-Discovery

Give Everything You Have

Give everything you have,
and after you have given,
give what’s left.
After you give what’s left,
give what remains.
After giving that,
give the feeling of having given.
After giving the feeling
of having given,
give what you get
for having given.
Then give again,
never stopping, always giving.
And should it come to pass that you forget,
forgive yourself immediately.
Then begin again,
giving everything you have,
and after you have given,
give what’s left.

Standing at the Threshold

A few years ago I found myself standing in my closet, madly searching for clean clothes in a last minute attempt to pack before yet another business trip, when I noticed my 4-year old son standing at the entrance. In one hand, he held a small blue wand, in the other — a plastic bottle of soapy water. “Dada,” he said, looking up at me, his eyes wide open, “do you have time to catch my bubbles?”

Time? It stopped. And so did I. At that moment, it suddenly made no difference whether or not I caught my plane — I could barely catch my breath. The only thing that existed was him and that soulful look of longing in his eyes.

For the next ten minutes, all we did was play — him blowing bubbles and laughing. Me catching and laughing, too. His need was completely satisfied. His need for connection. His need for love. His need for knowing, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that absolutely everything was perfect just the way it was.

Thank you my heartfelt Reminder

This basic awareness,
this heartfelt feeling,
from which everything starts
and everything ends
in which there is no name,
except maybe that one;
“i am who i am”,
so easy to feel,
as a breath itself
to pick up with it
all inner gifts of peace,
to pick up with it
all the love
that is between
this breath and lungs
and accept them in consciousness
yet for some so hard to understand

Thank goodness
i have you
my dear heartfelt Reminder. :)

Stoyan Svet

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A Blank Page

I’m sitting in front of another blank page, while jazz quietly plays through my computer speakers. This is truly my idea of a great time. It starts in the moment and continues into the next.

I enjoy being reminded that each page in my life is unfolding before me and I love the mystery of not knowing what will manifest next. It’s like an unfinished sculpture or an incomplete song.

It slowly develops, creating its own shape and form, moving my fingers along the letter keys into unknown territories. I delve a little deeper and something else manifests.

Maybe it’s just a gentle nudge or a hint of something sweet that opens another door, a portal perhaps into another world within this one. Ah!!! now that’s what I call Eureka.

Happy for No Reason

When I was 21, I came within five seconds of drowning in the ocean. As I was going down for the third time, I looked to the shore and realized that this — my last moment — was the most lucid moment of my life. Everything else was a cartoon. Unreal. Fake. In the state I was in, only one thing was certain. I wanted to live.

And in that moment, which felt like my last, something extraordinary took over — way beyond my exhaustion — and got me to the shore. It swam me, until I — completely out of breath — could finally stand. And when I did, I fell to my knees and kissed the ground. I cried. I laughed. I sang whatever children’s songs I could remember. In that moment of pure exaltation, I had no philosophy, no religion, no politics, no family, no friends, no future, no past.

Only the simple joy of being alive.

Meeting his eyes

As long as you understand

who is backing up whom

and who is backing up what

everything is more and more right

you become more and more kind

to that sweet peace in your heart

you become more and more thankful

humble to that sweet inner love

and then you again and again understand

why you so long to meet his eyes

why you so need

that heart’s mirroring touch :)